That's gonna get you in a whole heap of trouble...

But other horror movies have gone as far as to make everyday occurrences seem dangerous. And by viewing one of these flicks, it’s possible that your habits could be changed forever – no matter how unlikely the events in the movie are.
Here are five examples of films that once watched, could change the way you think forever (in a bad way).

1. Jaws

This is a classic example. A film that once viewed, is likely to pop into your head every time you even think about going into the sea. Although you can probably count the number of annual shark related deaths on both hands (just 447 fatal attacks worldwide between 1580 and 2010 according to the ISAF [1]), thanks to Jaws, the risk of you being eaten when in open water is always very real – even if you’re only paddling ankle deep or standing in a particularly deep puddle.

There are lots of stories about the mass panic that Jaws caused upon its release. People went out lynching sharks in fishing boats because all of a sudden they realized just what they were capable of.
But far more devastating than the impact on the shark population was the psychological trauma that was suffered by those that saw the movie. People were scared to swim in the sea, people were scared to swim in public pools, and people were scared to take a bath (probably).

Come on in, it's not so bad!

There was no denying that Jaws was an excellent film, playing on our psyche in a most effective way. But soon enough, this model of horror was jumped upon by just about every other film producer, playing on our every phobia and generally making us question whether it’s even safe for us to get out of bed in the morning.

Read the Love Horror review here: Jaws (1975)

2. Arachnophobia

Following on from the Jaws model is Arachnophobia, a film that took a great deal from the shark movie and brought the fear of nature out of the water and right into our dry, cosy, previously safe homes.
When a giant, killer spider from the Amazon hitches a ride to a small, sleepy American suburb it’s not long before it has reproduced with the local house spider and a deadly brood is killing off the human population.

Spiders are far from popular with people. In the west it is estimated that 55% of females and 18% of males have a phobia of them [2]. And although they creep us out, we like to avoid killing them as much as possible as they’re generally seen to be ‘good guy’ insects – killing flies and stuff. But maybe the reason that we actually leave them be is because we’re so scared that they might jump on us, bite us and cause pain and/or death. Ultimately, they just can’t be trusted.

Arachnophobia was widely seen as family entertainment and did well to water down horror to acceptable levels and thus make it suitable for network broadcast. But the long term psychological effect was huge and the TV networks inadvertently amplified the fear of spiders in an effort to raise viewer ratings.
After watching the movie any unusual looking spider that you found in your home could be a killer, cobwebs soon became potential death-traps and when discovered, it soon seemed like a good idea to incinerate any spiders nests with a match and an aerosol – just to be sure.
I bet you feel all itchy just thinking about it.

3. The Mist

John Carpenter did a good job at making us fear The Fog in his 1980 classic, but when we had just assured ourselves that ghost leper pirates weren’t a real threat, along came a film adaptation of Stephen King’s The Mist to keep us on our toes. That’s right, ghosts are unlikely, but a government experiment resulting in the emergence of mutant, space dinosaurs is just the sort of thing that we expect after exposure to Cloverfield, The Thing and Jurassic Park.

It seems conceivable that humans have tampered with nature/interdimensional travel enough to unleash a surreal mutant apocalypse and the fact that the monsters in The Mist are never really explained, just adds to the terror. ‘It’s all a cover-up, just like 9-11 and Area 51′ you tell yourself ‘My god this really could happen!’
The event in question takes place on a typical day in a typical daily setting (a supermarket) and added to the freaky things that lurk in the fog is the horror that lurks inside all of us – when there is an apocalypse, humans turn into assholes and turn on each other.

After bearing the tension of living in fear of mist and fog and people for a good hour you’re likely to never be able to look at a fog bank in the same way again. Is it just morning dew or the beginning of the end?
And then there’s the ending of the movie… Oh the ending!
It’s likely to leave a stain on your brain that will never be erased.

More damn spiders!

4. The Blair Witch

This genre defining found footage movie had a mixed reception. Upon its release approximately 50 percentage of the population found it terrifying and the other 50 percent just didn’t get it (nominated for Worst Picture of 1999 at the Razzie Awards [3] but also #12 in top 100 scariest movies of all time [4]).
The explanation for this difference in opinion was largely

Welcome to hell.

For those who haven’t had the pleasure of spending a frozen night in complete darkness, surrounded by unseen sounds and creatures, the idea of twig figures and scratchy noises just outside your tent are unfamiliar and not alarming.
But if you’ve camped in the wild and know how vulnerable a nylon shelter can feel when confronted by nature and your own imagination, The Blair Witch pretty much plays on everything you’ve ever feared.

As if bears, wolves, snakes and homicidal red necks weren’t enough to worry about, there’s now an invisible witch who plays with your mind before kidnapping and dismembering you. Worse still, she probably has friends – ghosts, werewolves, zombies. They all want to chow down on you in their creepy shell of a home.
‘Toasted marshmallows anyone? Wait, those aren’t marshmallows!!’

5. Audition

So you can avoid the sea, you can escape the fog and you can vow never to go camping again, but there’s one thing in all our lives that is hard to hide from. Love.
We’ve all been there. A relationship ends and we desperately long to find a new partner. And sometimes a friend offers to help out by arranging a blind date or two, or in the case of Audition, a mini X-Factor for girlfriends as opposed to pop stars. What’s the worst that could happen? You’re not going to end up living as a limbless mute in a sack are you? Well, maybe…

As if the fear of being alone wasn’t enough to play on our minds, thanks to Audition and other similar films (Fatal Attraction probably being the catalyst) it now seems very plausible that your next girlfriend will be straight up psychopath.
They could be beautiful (Species) or frumpy (Misery), looks don’t matter because ultimately it’s what’s inside that counts – a deranged mind which ultimately wants to toy with you, then kill you in a very slow and painful way.

"Shall we skip the 'are you a psycho' question? It really doesn't seem necessary..."

It’s no surprise then that after so many years of objectifying women, we would have a re-alignment. Women are equal with men on every level and that includes all the bad stuff;
yes they do fart,
no they don’t wake up looking beautiful,
and if they have issues, they’re just as likely to do you harm as the next guy.

Read the Love Horror review here: Audition

Inevitably, it also results in an influx of horror movie tedium. It’s always the same, endless re-showings of Halloween sequels plague our screens with their facile ventures into low grade fright flickery. So then, how do you avoid sifting through the sewage of video dungeon off cuts and ‘made for tv’ b*ll*cks in order to discover the perfect playlist of Halloween films? The answer is simple…we’ll do it for you.

What you see before you is a series of ‘top 5′ genre titles as chosen by the individuals here at the web site, each list designed to create the perfect night in on All Hallows Eve. They will both entertain and terrify you…enjoy!

Jonesy the Cat:

Hi, my name is Jonesy, I’m the one standing next to the nonchalant skeleton.

5.) The Garbage Pail Kids: Don’t think this is a horror? Lord knows it scared the s**t out of me. It was a toss up between this and Howard the Duck.

4.) Halloween: Obvious but essential. John Carpenter at his second best (The Thing is better). Less scary than it is brilliant, an exploration of sex and violence that does not patronise or exploit. Myers will haunt your nightmares.

3.) Snoop Dogg’s Hood of Horror: The D O double G minces his way through a series of Creepshowesque adventures. Includes demon dwarfs, urinal missfires, exploding chiwawas and Lando Calrisian. Perfectly awful stuff.

2.) Killer Condom: It’s all in the name. Team Troma and H.R. Giger wreak phychosexual havoc through New York’s seedy underbelly. A film more effective at encouraging abstinence than Twilight…

1.) Return of the Living Dead: “I can feel myself rotting…” For such a gloriously crappy movie, it did feature some cracking one liners! Admirable in both scope and stupidity, this film cannot be beat for perfect Halloween entertainment.


Mad Woman in the Attic:

A difficult challenge, but here is a list that has a bit of everything and is tailored to your Halloween needs (and yes, i carved that pumpkin, its not my face…or maybe it is?).

5.) George Romero’s gaudy and grotesque Creepshow to start with, a perfect way to ease into the festivities and a great accompaniment to pumpkin carving (i.e. not too scary, no one wants to accidentally cut their hand off in a moment of terror).

4.) Followed by Rob Zombie’s House of 1000 Corpses. A bit more scary and gory than the previous film, but still plenty of fun, plus some inspiration for those Halloween costumes.

3.) Its time to get a little bit more serious now, whilst still honoring the festive nature of the evening. The Wicker Man (1973, categorically NOT the 2006 abomination) is ideal for getting into the pagan mindset.

2.) Now something to ease the tension a little bit, maybe to watch with those left over trick-or-treat snacks: The Slumber Party Massacre. What’s Halloween without a bit of Slasher action? This overlooked gem has everything you’d want – girls in nighties, an insane killer – and it was written/directed by a couple of feminists, so there.

1.) Ok, it’s the big one, the fun’s over, something to scare you silly before bedtime: The Others. This was a tough choice, I nearly went with The Shining, but thought this would better to round out the evening. Its got a big isolated house, lots of darkness, dead people, small children and Nicole Kidman’s eerily white face. Perfect.


Zombie1:

Damn! I wanted to have Creepshow in mine! Never mind, there are plenty of other great horrors that are perfectly suited to the nastiest night of the year…

5.) Zombie Flesh Eaters: Things go mad in a zombie kind of way when a apparently abandoned yacht returns to Manhattan from the West Indies. On board is a man who has been infected by some kind of ‘illness’ that causes him to eat people and turn them into zombies too. Okay, you’ve heard it all before, but have you ever seen a zombie wrestle a shark underwater? Didn’t think so.

4.) The Woman in Black: An excellent book, a highly regarded stage play, but have you ever seen the film? It’s pretty hard to get hold of (I got a VHS on bay) but this BBC production is still excellent, if a little bit basic. One of the best ghost stories around and a film that will really give you the chills. You’ll be looking over your shoulder for the woman in black for the rest of the evening (maybe the rest of your life) – guaranteed.

3. ) Tourist Trap: A killer who lives in an old tourist attraction and controls manequins via telekenesis to make them murder his prey. What more do you need to know? Oh, and he has a freaky doll-face mask. Nasty! Creepy, weird and lots of fun.

2.) Halloween 3 – Season of the Witch: So you want to watch a Halloween film on Halloween, but have seen the ‘original’ too many times? Well, before you resort to Rob Zombie, check out Halloween 3.

No Michael Myers, no psychopathic slasher, but instead an evil corporation wanting to kill as many people as possible on All Hallows Eve using their own TV sets.

1.) The Burning:  One of the original slashers from the golden era of horror. You have your essential elements, a summer camp, some kids playing a prank (that goes horribly wrong), and the mutilated monster that wants revenge on any cocky teenagers that it finds. A little known hidden gem. Good, old-fashioned, slash-tastic horror!



Zombie2:

Hello and happy Halloween to all our rabid readers. This is a picture of me from a Halloween party at Zombie1′s crypt a couple of years ago. As you can see decomposition has not been too good for my skin.

5.) Dead of Night: This 1945 British portmanteau movie includes a collection of random characters telling 5 tales of terror. Varying from the ridiculous gentlemen ghost’s in ‘Golfing Story’ to the petrifying puppet in ‘The Ventriloquist’s Dummy’ to the crazy nightmarish climax of the wraparound narrative each mini-masterpiece is sublimely short and scary and a perfect start to a monster movie marathon.

4.) Urban Legend: Urban myths and legends are contemporary fairytales which permeate our society not only shaping our morality and attitudes but scaring the bejeebus out of us in the process. A truly original modern slasher with some ingenious murders, Urban Legend takes all those stories you have heard, which happened to someone, who knew someone, and makes them real.

3.) The Thing: Choosing one John Carpenter film is a hard task especially when the man has directed such a variety of brilliant horror movies. As the most obvious choice has already been mentioned I have opted for this stone cold classic full of excellent performances, nail biting tension and great special effects. Snow covered tundra, Kurt Russell with a beard and a shape shifting monster which could be inside anyone ready to explode out and eat you – what more could you want.

2.) The Hitcher: Rutger Hauer is hypnotising as the psychopathic hell-bent hitch-hiker driven by unknown forces to relentlessly pursue the poor young guy, whose only mistake was to pick him up. Inspired by The Doors “Riders on the Storm” this is a flawless film with an iconic killer that stays with you even once the credits have rolled by.

1.) The Entity: Halloween is not complete without a good ghost story and this genuinely chilling 80′s horror classic is guaranteed to give you nightmares. With a simple story written by a twisted imagination and brought to life with some amazing effects, this is nasty supernatural chiller chock full of spooky scenes. It’s also supposedly based on a true story which makes it even more frightening.